The Reflection

She is you

You have read the books. You have listened to the podcasts. You have maybe even been to therapy. And in some ways, all of that helped. It made you feel less alone. It gave you language for some of what you were feeling. Maybe Glennon Doyle’s Untamed cracked something open in you, that quiet recognition of “isn’t there supposed to be more than this?”

But you still feel stuck. And you are starting to wonder why.

Here is what I want you to understand: the books and the podcasts were never designed to guide you forward. They were designed to help you feel less alone inside the experience. And feeling less alone is meaningful. But it is not the same as actually moving because information does not necessarily lead to transformation.

The symbol that changed my life

There is a sacred Thai symbol called the Unalome. It has been the logo of my brand since the very beginning, as it represents the path towards peace. It was also my first tattoo (even though I swore I would never get a tattoo!). My husband John and I traveled to Thailand together after dating for only 7 months, and we ended up getting matching Unalomes, because individually and together, we wanted a permanent reminder that there is always a path to get unstuck.

The Unalome begins with a spiral that represents the place where so many of us spend so much of our lives: on autopilot, spinning in familiar patterns, moving without awareness. It is like the hamster wheel of life; it is not a bad place, it is simply a stuck one.

Emerging from the spiral is a line; I call that point of connection the mindful moment. It is the moment you recognize that you are in the spiral, but more importantly, that there is a way out. At that threshold of the spiral and the line, you have a choice: you can go back into the spiral because it is familiar, it’s habit and because you know how to operate there, or you can choose to work your way out.

But note, that path out of the spiral is not straight. It has twists and undulations and moments where it curves back. But over time it settles, and that represents peace. We often stay in the spiral because creating new patterns can feel harder than staying with old ones, even when the old ones keep you stuck or are no longer aligned. 

You may now realize you are in the spiral, or perhaps you have known for a while. But maybe what you haven’t had is a guide who knows the way through, because she has already walked it herself. That is what I am here for. And this is where your journey forward begins.

The honest truth about awareness

Awareness sucks. And I say that with love, because I mean it.

Once you truly see and feel what is true for you, you cannot unsee it. Before that moment, it was possible to stay busy, to rationalize, to minimize, to push it down and keep moving. But once awareness lands in both your mind and your body, a kind of internal honesty takes hold that is very hard to turn away from.

That is why becoming aware can feel scary. Because with awareness comes the quiet responsibility of knowing. And knowing feels like it demands something of you.

You do not have to know what you will do with what you discover. You only need to be willing to hear it. The Reflection is simply the space where that begins.

What has kept you in the spiral

You may recognize some version of these thoughts:

• “I think I am happy. So why do I feel so unfulfilled?”
• “I should be more grateful. Other people have it so much worse.”
• “I give everything to everyone else. When do I get to acknowledge what I need?”
• “I have done the work. Read the books. Been to therapy. Why don’t I feel any different?”
• “The next five years cannot look like the last five. But I do not know where to start.”
• “I feel a slow resentment building and I am not sure what to do with it.”

If any (or all) of these resonated, you are not alone, you are seen. Feeling how you feel does not make you ungrateful for the life you have. It makes you a woman who has been carrying something real with no safe place to set it down. That ends here.

I want to be honest with you about something: most therapists guide their clients toward a courage they have never had to practice themselves. I am not that therapist. Everything I teach, I have lived. Every tool I offer, I use. I am not speaking to you from a safe distance. I am speaking to you from the other side of the exact spiral you may be standing in right now.

The Reflection is where it begins. Just a toe in the water. You hold all the power over when and whether you go deeper.

The Reflection is…

• Permission to hear yourself honestly
• A guided moment to pause, not a plan
• The first step out of the spiral
• To help put language for what you have been feeling
• A self-compassionate practice of self-care

THE REFLECTION IS NOT:

• A program, course or content to keep up on
• A plan you have to follow
• A roadmap for change
• Something you’re expected to act on
• Another to-do item to simply check off your list

Inside The Reflection

You will receive 5 guided prompts designed to help you slow down, name what has been hard to name, and honor what is arising without judgment or pressure. You can move through it in one sitting or return to it whenever you need a moment to come back to yourself.

There is nothing to perform and nothing to solve. The only intention is gentle awareness and self-reflection. I always say, you can’t change what you are not aware of, and this is simply a practice in paying attention to what has been bubbling under the surface.

You are worthy.

What you feel matters.

The time to honor yourself is now.

If you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it!

You have been waiting for someone to see you, hear you, and honor what you feel.

This is where you learn to do that for yourself first. And that changes everything.